My teacher training course starts tonight, 6-10. I’m excited that after all this time it’s finally going to happen! I signed up and mailed my check a few weeks ago, and since then it just feels like I’ve been waiting. And planning. F and I have had to keep the TT in mind as we make any sort of plans for the rest of the year – everything from our travel plans for his sister’s wedding in May, to whether and when we’re going to buy a house, has to be discussed with an eye to when my yoga weekends are. Most of the TT dates aren’t even set in stone yet – we’ll be talking about that at the first meeting tonight, which I’m worried about, because F and I planned everything in May around that weekend. My sis-in-law has booked her wedding reception and we’ve booked our flights, and my fingers are firmly crossed that no one in my TT class has a conflict. I keep imagining possible scenarios where things don’t work out, which is unlikely and isn’t useful to anyone. I have to keep telling myself that I don’t have anything to get upset about yet, so there’s no use getting upset.
I guess I’m just nervous. This is such a big deal for me, and I’ve been wanting to do it and looking forward to it for so long. I don’t know N & J (the teachers) very well yet; although I do like them, I don’t really know their teaching style well and don’t know what they will expect. Of course I’m also worried about the other students in the class. There will be 12 of us all together, only one of whom I know I’ve met and like. In the regular yoga classes I’ve attended at this studio, it seems like everybody knows everybody else. Will the other students be cliquey? Will they be nice or mean, will we have things to talk about, will they like me? More importantly, are we going to be able to work together for the next ten months?
Plus I need to coordinate all the details of fitting this commitment into my regular life. What time do I need to leave work to get there on time, and what am I having for dinner, and what will I pack for lunch tomorrow, and what will F do all day on Saturday if he’s stuck at home without the car? I’m hoping that these things will become more second nature as time passes and we get more comfortable with this additional lump on the calendar.
Today I am reminding myself to breathe, and to be excited, and that all manner of things shall be well. I’m looking forward to updating next week with what an amazing weekend I had.