In honor of the impending American holiday of feasting, I bring you: A Tasting of Four Meatless “Turkeys” for the Holiday Table. The writer assembled an expert panel of tasters, including vegetarians, devout carnivores, and children, to try four different meatless “turkey” products, and the result is a really interesting review. I’m trying the Quorn product for my Thanksgiving.
My mom keeps asking if I want a vegetable lasagna, and I keep saying, no, get the turkey. Veggie lasagna will be fine for Christmas, but at Thanksgiving, I and everyone else want turkey, and I don’t want to deprive my family of bird meat just because I’m not eating any. I’m sure that whatever meatless bird I end up with will suffer in comparison next to a bird of actual bird origin, especially when they’re placed on the table together, and I suspect my mom wants to save me the disappointment of having to eat some substandard weird non-meat while the rest of the family chows down happily, but to be honest, I never really liked turkey all that much anyway – it’s always been mostly symbolic for me. I always looked forward to the side dishes most of all, even when I was a kid. Last year was the first time I really got into my turkey leftovers because it was the first time we ever found something cool to do with them (turkey pot pies and turkey burritos), so I am a little sad to lose my turkey leftover opportunities just when I’d finally found something I liked. But as long as there’s something vaguely resembling turkey on my plate, and as long as I have mashed potatoes and corn pudding and homemade applesauce and cranberry bread and pumpkin bread and pumpkin chocolate chip cookies and maybe pie, I’ll be happy enough this Thanksgiving. I’ll give you the full report on what we ate and whether I made anyone try the non-turkey after the holiday.